The Epitome of Fictional Cool


People are constantly saying to me:

“Evan!  You are so freaking cool!  How do you have such style, such grace such flair?”


When people say that, I just smile graciously and give the same answer…

“I’m really quite something.”

And then to foster my reputation for mystery and timing, I walk away.

But today, (oh today!)  I’m going to give you a list which will help to explain my abundance of awesome.  A list which will give every man something to aspire towards, and every woman something of which to think fondly.


(Wow, when I started to type that I thought it was going to fit neatly on one line.  Then it just sort of snowballed as I kept thinking up qualifies for the list. Ah well.)

Here they are, in countdown form.



Thomas Crown

Rich, Devious, Cool

Thomas Crown as played by Steve McQueen

He only comes in fifth because he is the only character on this list that didn’t originate as a character from literature.  In terms of his pure, unadulterated coolness, this bank robbing, turtleneck sweater wearing, thrill seeking badass is tops.  He had money and a knack for spending it on things that only enhances his cool quotient.  Glider planes? Fancy bar in your office? Sweet Cars and financing bank heists?  All cool.



Sherlock Holmes

Smart, Obnoxious, Cool

Sherlock Holmes as played by Robert Downey, Jr.

Doyle’s classic case solving, hat wearing, pipe chewing hero was done well by Robert Downey, Jr.  He manages the age old trick of looking cool while clearly not giving a damn how he looks.  Solving the case and making other people look dumb is just a side bonus.



James Bond

British, Sexy, Cool

James Bond as played by Sean Connery


Now, I don’t want to get into a debate about which Bond is the best, because there IS no debate.  Sean Connery is James Bond.  Because Fleming’s character was noted for being BOTH tough and suave.  Moore was just suave (debatable even on that front), Brosnan was just suave, and now Craig is just tough (though he’s getting better).  But Connery’s Bond was believable in a fight and believable in a tuxedo.  AND believable FIGHTING IN A TUXEDO.  Too cool for words.  But, too cliche to crack the top 2 on my list.



Mr. Darcy

Proper, Wordsmith, Cool

Fitzwilliam Darcy as played by Colin Firth


Maybe this is my personal bias (and shouldn’t it be? It is MY blog after all) but I love Jane Austen.  And by the end of Pride and Prejudice I think she had made Mr. Darcy into what she considered the ideal man.  And I figure that as men we should learn from what women think is ideal.  Firth shows off how a man can be aloof and cool at the same time.  An important tool in any rogue’s belt.   Plus, he writes Lizzy such an awesome letter!  (topic for a future blog… How love letters should be re-inserted into modern life)  Plus, cool was different notion in way old England.  So he earns points for being cool in multiple centuries.



Atticus Finch

Honorable, Intense, Cool

Atticus Finch as played by Gregory Peck

Harper Lee’s novel To Kill a Mockingbird is a classic.  And Atticus Finch is an equally classic character.  He engenders so much integrity and believable love for his family and the town in which he lives that he had been beloved by generations of readers.

BUT THAT’S NOT ALL!  He also rocked a three piece suit.  His hair was immaculate.  And if you watch the movie closely, every female in the entire movie makes googly eyes at Gregory Peck.  And who can blame them?  He was the perfect blend of broodingly awesome lawyer and sensitive loving father.  If I could grow up to be anyone fictional… I would want to be Peck’s Finch.  (that sounded dirtier than I expected).


So there you have it.  Are you a dude?  Do you want to be cooler?

Then try to be more like me.


But if you can’t pull off THAT herculean task, then perhaps you should set your sights a bit lower onto one of my top five style icons.   Taking on any of their qualities will help you in your quest to be a little more awesome.




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